Read more in this series: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12
As temples of the Holy Spirit, we exist to glorify God while we welcome people into His presence. Every choice in our lives should conform to this purpose.
In this series we are exploring what it means to be temples of the Holy Spirit. We’re looking at the nine types of people who visit temples so that we can understand their motivation. If we understand what drives them, we will better understand how to help them on their journey towards the Lord.
The Fourth Visitor - The Disappointed
Now we come to the sad and lonely man. He has almost made it to the temple courts, but he is stuck just outside the gates with his head hung low. This is the fourth visitor, the Disappointed.
The Disappointed is struggling to find hope. He desperately wants it, but he doesn’t realize that all he has to do is walk through the gates.
There are three questions keeping him from moving forward. They seem like natural questions to ask, but they are the wrong questions. If we can help him ask the right questions, we can help him discover hope that covers every part of his life.
The Gates of Thankfulness and Praise
The way out of disappointment always leads through thankfulness and praise. These are the gates of the temple.
Psalm 100:4 ESV - Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name!
Scripture tells us over and over again to be thankful in all circumstances. It’s not just good advice; it’s a command.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ESV - Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
But why is thankfulness so important, and what does praise have to do with it?
Thankfulness is important because it brings us back to faith. When we thank God for what He has done, we naturally remember all the times He has been faithful. That helps us trust in what He’s doing now and helps us hope in what He will do.
“God, thank you for providing for me. You didn’t let me starve then; you will sustain me now. You have provided, you are providing, you will provide. Thank you.”
When we thank God for what He does, we begin to recognize who He is. We begin to praise Him for His character.
“God, you are good; I trust you to do good things, because the things you do flow from who you are. You are kind. You are strong. You are encouraging. You are faithful.”
Thankfulness gives us ground to stand on because it helps us remember God’s faithfulness. Praise encourages us to move forward to experience more of who God is.
Three Big Questions
To the Disappointed, thankfulness and praise can seem unwelcome. That’s because disappointed people have experienced loss.
It could be physical, emotional, relational, or spiritual. It could be as small as a lost object or as earth-shattering a lost loved one. It may even be that the loss hasn’t happened yet, but the expectation of it is so certain that it might as well be real.
As priests serving in the temple of the Holy Spirit, our goal should be to help them rediscover thankfulness and praise. We can help them walk through the gates to experience more of God’s presence.
When someone is in an accident, we can say, “Thank God you’re okay!”
When a friend’s loved one dies, we can say, “I’m so thankful that I got to know him.”
Simple, gentle statements can plant seeds of thankfulness that will grow and bloom over time.
But sometimes those seeds fall on rocky soil. Sometimes even the most gentle expressions of thankfulness and praise are met with strong opposition in the form of grumbling and doubt.
“Thankful? Easy for you to say! You at least have something to be thankful for. Why would God let this happen? Where was He when I needed Him?”
We all have things to be thankful for, but when we are disappointed, those things can be hard to recognize. When we give into disappointment, we open the doors for the enemy to build strongholds in our minds. Those strongholds are built on three questions.
Why did this happen?
Where was God?
What am I supposed to do now?
We run to strongholds to avoid facing the truth. Because of this, it can be hard to tackle strongholds head on. Strongholds are fortresses—they are designed to withstand attack. If we abandon gentleness and try to argue people into thankfulness and praise, we will only deepen the spiritual wounds that led them to disappointment in the first place.
The best way to tear down strongholds is to gently shake the sand they are built on. Shake the sand, and all the arguments built upon it will come crashing down.
We shake the sand by asking the right questions.
Question 1 - Who is God?
The key to asking the right questions is to ask them in such a way that it leads people back to the word of God.
John 8:31-32 ESV - So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
The first question most disappointed people ask is, “Why did this happen?”
We ask that question when we experience loss because we are looking for a way to find meaning in the loss. It’s not loss itself that bothers us; we are bothered when the loss has no meaning.
We lose things all the time. When we buy things, we lose money. When we work for money, we lose time and energy. When we get married and have children, we lose our independence.
Most people are willing to part with something in exchange for something better. It’s when we get nothing in return that we become disappointed. That’s what leads us to ask why—the search for meaning. If we can somehow find meaning and purpose in the loss, then maybe the pain of loss won’t hurt as much.
There are answers in the Bible for why bad things happen. Bible scholars can lead people from Genesis to Revelation and explain concepts like the fall of man and common grace.
It would benefit all of us to be able to do that, but a better approach might be to focus on who God is, with the goal of discovering His goodness.
If God is good—perfectly, incorruptibly good—then even if bad things happen, God is still good. No bad thing can make Him less good. It’s the other way around.
Before God created the universe, all was dark and void. Empty, the way our hearts are empty when we lose something or someone dear to us.
Then God said, “Let there be light.”
God is light, and in Him is no darkness at all (1 John 1:5). When He walks into a dark room, the room isn’t dark anymore. His presence changes things.
When God walks into a bad situation, the situation changes. He sees the void left behind by loss and fills it with something good. What was taken away becomes an opportunity to receive something new.
If we want God to change our situation, then the second question we should be asking is…
Question 2 - Where is God?
A disappointed person will ask, “Where was God when I needed Him?”
The implication in this question is that God abandoned us in our time of need, but the truth is, He was right there in the midst of our suffering. He never left. He felt all of our pain more deeply and completely than we ever could, and in the midst of that suffering, He didn’t abandon us. In fact, He wants to heal us.
Psalm 34:18 ESV - The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
Instead of asking where He was, we need to run to where He is.
Jesus Christ is the only way to find any true meaning in our pain. He is the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Him (John 14:6).
When we find Jesus, we find purpose. When we run from God, we hide our pain from the only one who could give it meaning. But when we search for Him, we find that He was never far away. He’s been with us all along, waiting to take our pain upon Himself.
Jesus takes our ashes and gives us beauty; He takes our mourning and gives us dancing. When we bring our pain to Jesus, it stops being meaningless. He transforms it into a testimony of His incredible grace and mercy.
“Jesus, I don’t understand why this happened. It hurts. But I know you are good. I know you are kind. I know you are loving, so I trust you with my pain. I choose to follow you through it. Please welcome me into your presence and bring good out of this situation.”
Jeremiah 29:13 ESV - You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.
Romans 10:13 ESV - For “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”
When we ask Him to save us, He does. When we seek Him, we find Him. And in finding Him, we find answers to the third question:
Question 3 - What Would You Have Me Do?
Disappointed people ask, “What am I supposed to do now?”
The implication is that there is no hope—that no matter what we do, it will accomplish nothing.
In a way, they’re right. We are powerless to save ourselves. But when we humble ourselves and take our pain to the One who lifts our head, the question changes. It takes on a submissive tone.
Our will might be to have never experienced pain and loss in the first place. But when we submit our will to God’s will—when we stop trying to fight so hard and simply surrender to His goodness—we ask, “What is your will, Lord? What would you have me do?”
That’s when He gives us an incredible gift.
Heaven is a perfect place where there will be no more pain and suffering. In Heaven there will be no more doubt or anguish. We should all long for Heaven.
But here on this earth, we have a chance to do something we won’t be able to do in Heaven.
We can worship God with voices that shake and waver. We can lift frail hands to Him in adoration. In spite of our failures, in spite of our losses, in spite of our handicaps, we can shout, “Blessed be the name of the Lord!”
It is only here, in this fallen world, that we can grow old and weak and yet stand firm against the onslaught of the enemy, trusting in the power of our Lord to be our strength.
It is only now, when men revile us, imprison us, and kill us, that we can rejoice in the midst of suffering. Only when we are being persecuted can we pray, “Lord, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:24)
Without God, this world is simply broken. But when we turn to the Lord, every painful moment becomes a stage set for testimony. What the enemy intends for evil, God uses for good. (Genesis 50:20)
The pain we experience may be somebody else’s last chance. How many hearts throughout the ages have been won over by mercy and love in the face of unimaginable cruelty? How many perpetrators of great crimes have repented because of the unwarranted kindness shown to them by their victims?
1 Timothy 1:15-16 ESV - The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life.
Knowing Jesus isn’t about making the pain go away. That’s what Heaven is for. Knowing Jesus is about redeeming the pain and allowing Him to give it purpose. Knowing Jesus is about letting His love flow through us to give hope to a loveless world.
Here we have a chance to be a comfort to others. We have a chance to show kindness to our enemies. We have a chance to touch the untouchable, to love the unlovable, and to lead those who mourn into perfect peace.
When we shine in the darkness with the light of Christ, the very pain that threatens to destroy us becomes our greatest ally, because it’s where God’s power is shown the strongest.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 ESV - But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
If we can carefully, gently help the heartbroken see this, we open the path for them to step through the gates, into the courts of praise.